Frustration

Almost 2 weeks since my surgery and my new knee in on the mend.  I was hoping during the operation while I was unconscious I would see my Denise, but no such luck.  In many ways I feel I have been walking lightly in her shoes.  I have been lying in her place on the couch, enduring numerous shots and keeping my mediation close so I don't forget to take it. But most of all I have been feeling her frustration.  I have always been a very active and independent person and Denise was the same.  If something needs done we need to do it and do it now.  How frustrating it is when your body wouldn't let you.  I know within weeks with the help of physical therapy my knee will be back to normal, but that is not the case with a brain tumor.  When Denise started losing her balance it didn't get better, neither did her speech or her short term memory.  She would get very frustrated when her legs wouldn't hold her or when what she wanted to say in her head wouldn't come out of her mouth.  I would try to reassure her that everything would be okay, but that was not to be.  How do you tell someone that normal everyday abilities we all take for granted like talking and walking are disappearing forever.

By the end of May my knee will be back to normal and I will be walking in the Walk to end Brain Tumors.  On May 29th all of  Denise's People will be my daughters legs and voices helping to bring about awareness and helping to find a cure for this horrible cancer.  I wouldn't be a bit surprised if she isn't marching along with us in spirit.

Thank you for being one Denise's People.